The Others

I was talking to an old friend from Galveston today. She said after the hurricane all she could do was focus on herself and after a while, she thought this isn't good. You can't stay focused on just yourself and I find that is exactly what I've been doing too.
I was so angry today at the doctor and every time I talked about it my anxiety level went up and that is NOT A GOOD THING FOR ME RIGHT NOW. I know I have to continue to deal, but then I'm going to let stuff go and focus on the positive as there are so many positives surrounding all of us.
I always make friends with the hospital staff simple because I treat them with respect and show interest in them. It takes so little effort to show someone you care and makes all the difference in your interactions. Just asking someone how their day is going is often a huge change from what people often hear.
The other thing is that I thought I never wanted to be one of those old people who talked about their various illnesses and here I am, only 53 and already doing it. I feel like the more I talk about it the more power I give it and so from now on I'm going to focus more on the "what I'm doing to get healthy."--goddamnit!!!! I love that word because it is so shocking to so many people and it really means nothing at all.
It truly is amazing to me the people I have run into in my quest for health. They are all such good people and the majority of them really just want to help you. There is, of course, the occasional asshole or control freak, and I think to myself- if thats the way you need to act to feel good about yourself then go for it because it has nothing to do with me and does not effect me unless I choose to let it. This is sometime easier said than done, but, as with most things, practice will make it easier.